Nudist colony - one for the older Bullspenners (of which I am nbot yet a part)

[Brad]

A man joined a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day he took off his clothes and started to wander around the area. A gorgeous petite blonde walked by, and the man immediately got an erection. 

The woman noticed his erection, came over to him and asked, "did you call for me?" 

The man replied, "No, what do you mean?" 

She said, "You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me." Smiling, she led him to the side of the swimming pool, laid down on a towel eagerly pulled him to her and happily let him have his way with her. 

Later, the man continued to explore the colony's facilities. He entered the sauna and as he sat down, he farted. Within seconds a huge, hairy man lumbered out of the steam room toward him. 

"Did you call for me? " asked the hairy man. 

"No, what do you mean?" replied the newcomer. 

"You must be new." answered the hairy man, "It's a rule that if you fart, it implies that you called for me." The huge man easily spun him around, put him over a bench and had his way with the newcomer. 

The newcomer staggered back to the colony office where he was greeted by a smiling, naked receptionist, "May I help you?" she asked.

"Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the $500 membership fee." 

"But, Sir," she replied, "you've only been here a few hours. You haven't had a chance to see all our facilities." 

"Listen lady, I' m 68 years old. I only get an erection once a month, but I fart 15 times a day. I'm outta here."

[E.T.]

Related . . .

Who's the most popular guy at a nudist colony ?

The guy who can carry a dozon donuts, and 2 cups of coffee.

Who's the most popular woman ?

The one who can eat the last donut.

[Grateful Dad]

Two parents take their son on a vacation and go to a nude beach. The father goes for a walk on the beach and the son goes and plays in the water. The son comes running up to his mom and says, "Mommy, I saw ladies with boobies a lot bigger than yours!" The mom says, "The bigger they are, the dumber they are." So he goes back to play. Several minutes later, he comes running back and says, "Mommy, I saw men with dingers a lot bigger than Daddy's!"

The mom says, "The bigger they are, the dumber they are." Once again the son goes back to play. A short time later, he comes running back and says, "Mommy, I just saw Daddy talking to the dumbest lady I ever saw, and the more and more he talked, the dumber and dumber he got!"