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Life Thoughts

Jihme

By Jihme
in The Trough

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Jihme Toro Magnifico

Jihme

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Posted

LIFE  THOUGHTS

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with 'Guess' on it. So I said 'Implants?'  She slapped me.

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.

When I was young we used to go 'skinny dipping,' now I just 'chunky dunk.

Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?

Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside?

How come we choose from just  two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America ?

And remember:

Life is like a roll of toilet paper.

The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

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    “In my mind, I’m kind of like, ‘OK, excuses over'. We know what we need to do. We’ve got the right team together, and now we move forward, and we’ll evaluate and be accountable to each other, including myself, from this point forward.”

    Michael Kelly  

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