JOKES THAT CAN BE TOLD IN CHURCH

[BULLO12]

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little Girl whispered to her

mother, 'Why is the bride dressed in white?'

'Because white is the color of happiness, and Today is the happiest day of

her life.'

The child thought about this for a moment then Said, 'So why is the groom

wearing black?'

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A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was Running as fast as she could,

trying not to be late for Bible class.

As she ran she prayed, 'Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord,

please don't let me be late!'

While she was running and praying, she tripped on A curb and fell, getting

her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She Got up, brushed herself off,

and started running again! As she ran she Once again began to pray...

'Dear Lord, please don't let me be late...But Please don't shove me either!'

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Three boys are in the school yard bragging about Their fathers. The first

boy says, 'My Dad scribbles a few words on a Piece of paper, he calls it a

poem, they give him $50.'

The second boy says, 'That's nothing. My Dad Scribbles a few words on piece

of paper, he calls it a song, they give Him $100.'

The third boy says, 'I got you both beat. My Dad Scribbles a few words on a

piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and It takes eight people to collect

all the money!'

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An elderly woman died last month. Having never Married, she requested no

male pallbearers. In her handwritten Instructions for her memorial service,

she wrote, 'They wouldn't take Me out while I was alive, I don't want them

to take me out when I'm Dead.'

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A police recruit was asked during the exam, 'What Would you do if You had to

arrest your own mother?'

He answered, 'Call for backup.'

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A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph And Mary took Jesus with

them to Jerusalem . A small Child replied, 'They couldn't get a baby-sitter.'

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A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five

and six year olds.

After explaining the commandment to 'Honor thy Father and thy mother,' she

asked, 'Is there a commandment that Teaches us how to treat our brothers and

sisters?'

Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'

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At Sunday School they were teaching how God Created everything, including

human beings. Little Johnny seemed Especially intent when they told him how

Eve was crea ted out of one of Adam's ribs.

Later in the week his mother noticed him lying Down as though he were ill,

and she said, 'Johnny, what is the Matter?'

Little Johnny responded, 'I have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have

a wife.'

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Two boys were walking home from Sunday school After hearing a strong

preaching on the devil. One Said to the other, 'What do you think about all

This Satan stuff?'

The other boy replied, 'Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It's

probably just your Dad.'