___ Eats It

Baroid's head is so big, Charlie Brown is jealous.

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=1799171 BOSTON -- Johnny Damon plans to lose the caveman look for charity. The Red Sox center fielder said Monday he'll shave the beard he's had since the offseason to benefit the Boston public libraries' reading and tutoring programs for youngsters. The Gillette Co., based in Boston, will provide the funds for the programs, Damon said before the Red Sox played Cleveland. A call seeking comment from Gillette was not returned Monday. "Gillette told me to pick out an organization" to help, said Damon, who believes his shaving will take place May 21. He plans to keep his hair at shoulder length. "Gillette's the leading shaving brand anyway, so they're not too concerned" about providing funds for the programs, Damon said. "They don't have to do this but they want to." Damon said he's not getting paid for his participation. The reading program is geared to making sure students can read by the time they're in third grade, he said. Money also will go to a program for students to go to public libraries for help with homework. Damon was thinking of getting rid of the beard anyway. "It's starting to get hot," he said. "It's looking sloppy. I can always grow it back in two weeks." Damon reported to spring training in February with long hair that he hadn't cut for more than a year. He also had the beard, which he has trimmed since then. When he arrived in Fort Myers, Fla., Damon talked about his unusual after-dark training regime: racing cars on the Orlando street where he lives, which has a 25 mph speed limit. "Once a car starts coming, I'll just race it to my house," he said. "I scare the cars to speed up a little more, seeing a caveman-looking guy with long hair running at 10 or 11 at night." Might his next shaving experience lead to commercials for Gillette? "Hopefully, there's future things with them," Damon said. "It would be nice." ******************************************* On a related note, Baroid Bonds has announced he's going to auction off all his used needles and steroid vials on eBay and buy himself a bigger hat.

Bolts need to steal one of two to get home ice back. That's it. This team was too young and inexperienced to rattle off 15 wins in a row. It's a reality check, nothing more, nothing less. The fact that they got chippy at the end showed me that they finally woke up and will be ready for game 3. Winning 8 in a row will lull you to sleep into a false sense of confidence. That's over now.

That looks like Nicole Brown Simpson's younger sister. Watch out, girlie! Baroid might have a roid rage and pull out the Ginsu!

Don't bother giving Smazza the facts. They interfere with his anti-Boston agenda.

I don't see MikeB posting in this thread once. Hey, Smazz, did Baroid get a hit this month yet? ;D

I get discounted and comp XO tickets all the time from my company. Unfortunately, with most games being at night and having a baby who has a 7 PM bedtime, we're not able to go to most of them. It doesn't look like we're getting any freebies or discounts for the last two rounds though. The NHL has tightened up the purse strings like George Costanza.

Ugh. That was ugly.

She has a butt-chin, too.

http://www.brookehoganmusic.com/ Maybe it's just me, but I don't think she's that hot. She looks like a waitress you'd see in some sleazy diner in the desert in Arizona. Maybe you have to see her in person?

At least they only cheered once. ;D

I believe they will. I've heard that it will be available regardless of round.

Did you make that connection all by yourself, or did you have someone help you?

In particular, note Average and RBI. Baroid isn't producing as many runs as he should for someone who gets on base as much and has such a high slugging percentage. I'd expect more from "the greatest player who ever *cough* played" :

2004 Stats Manny Ramirez vs. Baroid Bonds http://tinyurl.com/24cyq Games: Manny 31 Baroid 29 At Bats: Manny 122 Baroid 66 Runs: Baroid 26 Manny 21 Hits: Baroid 25 Manny 45 2B: Baroid 5 Manny 9 HR: Baroid 10 Manny 8 RBI: Baroid 22 Manny 21 Total Bases: Baroid 60 Manny 78 Walks: Baroid 50 Manny 17 Strikeouts: Baroid 7 Manny 21 Steals: Baroid 2 Manny 1 Slugging Percentage: Baroid .909 Manny .636 Average: Baroid .379 Manny .369 Hmmm... those stats are pretty close to each other, although Baroid has the slight edge in most. I wonder why the Giants have a losing record? ;D

"You know, I have one simple request. And that is to have right-fielders with overinflated bobbleheads attached to their shoulders. Now, evidently my cycloptic colleague tells me that BALCO makes this possible. Tell me, what do I pay you people for?"

There's not enough nitroglycerine in all of North America to fully submerge Baroids head in.

Giants - BALCO is the 2nd biggest rivalry in sports right now.

People were already lined up immediately after the end of game 1 for game 2 tickets. Unless you're in line already, you're not getting tix. ;D

Yankees can't go a season without buying players. Concept of "chemistry" is foreign to George. When the Yanks won 4 WS in 5 years a few years back, the core of players was the same pretty much throughout. Now it's Jeter, Posada, Williams, and a bunch of ringers. George may be the best owner in baseball, but he's a moron at clubhouse management.

Sox are still in first. Yawn.

There's a difference between a dysfunctional son and a CHEATING son. Gimme dysfunction any day over a lying stinking cheater.

Sorry... those too. I was replying to a quote made in Smazza's "let the players take steroids" thread that said: If that's not enough proof in itself, I don't know what is.

Interesting... Smazza has shifted from the "Baroid hasn't done steroids" argument to the "Let the players do Steroids" argument. Could that mean the vials have tested positive and he's just bracing for the backlash against the bobbleheaded cheater?

From WebMD: http://my.webmd.com/content/article/17/1676_50919.htm?lastselectedguid={5FE84E90-BC77-4056-A91C-9531713CA348} "Steroids are also widely used -- and abused -- by amateur and professional weightlifters and other athletes to give them an unfair advantage (which is why they are banned in international sports on both the amateur and professional levels). But the "advantage" often comes with a shockingly high price tag: In men, excessive steroid use can cause impotence, and it can also encourage the growth of cancer of the prostate. "