Clearly the only correct choice is 'Comrade Leavitt'
and
If our defense/d-line improves we call them The Gulag (or Bullag). "On 3rd and 1, they ran it right up the middle for no gain, that 'RB' has been detained by the Gulag" We'd clearly also always have to have a QB Spy.
Give me a few minutes and I'll think of more...and...I'm sorry